Timber's Morning Coffee

First of all, what is happiness? Let's take a look: Happiness  is a mental or emotional state of well-being defined by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. Happy mental states may also reflect judgements by a person about their overall well-being. So, that's a step in the right direction. We now have an idea of what happiness may contain. Let's specifically look at three key-words, which boil down to two ideas. The words are: mental state  and contentment . First, contentment. Let's look at a further definition of this. One source defines it as a mental or emotional state that is satisfied with things as they are. WHOA. That's huge! So, to be content, it mean that we are satisfied with things as they are. That means, the body, the environment, the job, the spouse and any other number of things. Contentment implies a certain level of acceptance. Truly, I believe that it is a daily occurrence. We accept that where we ...

For a long time, I have wanted to start paring down the things in my life. I've been an ultra-consumer before. I've wanted to have the latest and greatest everything. At one point in my life, I counted my shoes and I think I came up with 90 pair! What the hell am I going to do with that many shoes? How many of them did I really even wear? Well, to answer that question, not many. Over the course of the last few years, I've been able to pare down my shoe collection to maybe 12 pair. That, in itself, was a huge challenge for me. I have a tendency to be somewhat of a hoarder and it's been very difficult for me to let go of anything. Yes, my environment is clean and everything is "organized" and put away. No, there are no piles and pathways. My floor space is open and my home is neat. However, there have been certain things over the course of my life that I haven't been able to give up. Things of sentimental value are the hardest. But slowly, I have been gi...

I know I haven't posted anything in a while. Things around the household have slightly chaotic. Okay, more than slightly. It's been a downright whirlwind! You see, we have moved. "Where," you ask. Well, to the Oregon Coast. This is fulfilling a lifelong dream for me. Every since I was a small kid, I have always loved Oregon and the coast. I remember (mumble mumble) years ago (right after 3rd grade), my mother asked me if I would like to live in Oregon. I told her that I would, for maybe 6 weeks or so, but then I would miss Montana and my friends. Yup. And ever since then, I have missed the coast. Don't get me wrong - growing up in Montana was mostly amazing! I wouldn't trade most of those experiences for anything. But I've always felt that a part of me was missing. We went on several more trips over the years to see family and just enjoy the time out there. I went on one last trip by myself when I was 18 years old (Spring Break from my first year in...

What?!?!?! That might be the first question out of your mouth. HIV? A blessing? Really? Well. . .Yes. I know that there has been a ton of stigma associated with this diagnosis. You might be wondering why I would think that a disease that has the potential to kill me might be a gift. Well, for me, it has been and now I will explain why. HIV has forced me to re-evaluate everything in my life, from my relationships to my health to my personal possessions. Perhaps, earlier you might have read my post, " The Holidays are Not About Presents " Contained in that particular blog are some of my truths about the things that are important to me and the things that truly matter. For me, HIV has forced me to look at my health and really be mindful of what my body is telling me. I have to pay attention to the things that I eat, what I drink and what I allow to be in my body. It's super important for me to stay healthy. Before, I had the idea that most of us have: "It's no...

I have struggled with writing this blog for some time. I didn't know when the right time was going to be to do it. There have been many factors influencing my decision. My partner, family, friends, work, theatre, etc. It's been a bumpy ride and very challenging spiritually, emotionally, socially and physically. As I sit here in the middle of a snow storm next to my roaring fire in the comfort of my own home, I am mostly content. It feels safe here. The dogs are relaxing, the birds are quiet and I have the house to myself. I can almost feel like I am strong and nothing is changed. Nothing is different. Everything is going to be okay. But, four innocuous words, put together, could change that in an instant. You see, I have a secret. But I don't like secrets. They cause way too much stress. No, it's not that I'm gay. That's no secret to anyone. I mean, HELLO!!! Do you know me? The secret is even larger than that. It is earth-shattering, in some aspects. It is a...

I am regularly astounded by the things that I see when we get closer and closer to the Holidays. We enter a time when the earth goes dormant, but it would seem that the real crazies come out of hibernation.  It's those Black Friday shoppers. And now, it would seem, that there is a "Black Thanksgiving." Truly, it disgusts me. I see people being very hypocritical. We should be spending Thanksgiving weekend being thankful for what we have and the blessings in our lives, yet we see consumerism on a massive scale. Whatever happened to peace on earth and goodwill toward man? Oh, I think someone dropped it back on aisle 3 where they had to push an old lady out of the way to get the best deal for their already spoiled children. We profess to be thankful for the things that we have, yet we don't appear to be that way when we bang our shopping carts into other people, stab someone over a parking spot and get into a fist fight because someone got the last fireplace mantle be...

Recently, I have been turning toward the Beatitudes. I have looked at them from every direction and wondered why more "Christians" haven't taken to them as a way of life. The one that really struck me today was Matthew 5:9, "Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God." All my life, I have been a peacemaker. (Well, okay, there was one period of about 5 years where I tried to stir up as much drama with my family as I could. . .but let's not dwell on the past) I don't like it when people fight and I just want to see people get along. I seem to have been born with a highly developed sense of compassion and empathy. I used to (and still do) befriend what my mom lovingly termed, "The Unlovables." These were the kids that got picked on in school because they were different. The kids that had no friends. I was constantly asking questions as to why people were being treated so badly and my heart regularly broke for the...